Wednesday, September 06, 2006
The End Of Welsh Burberry
Oh no. I'm devastated. I just read this awful news - Burberry is closing. I can hear the wailing and gnashing of teeth all down Grand Avenue and from the hills of Llanedyn. My beloved Burberry is to close it's doors and stop making it's fine gear. So you know what that means. No more kosher Burberry, we's going to be stuck with the Splott Market knock offs from now.
To be honest, I didn't even know it was made in Wales, I always thought it was from North England as it's like them skirts the English blokes wear when they come down for the Rugby. Knowing it's going just make me that little bit sadder, especially now I know it's homegrown. Tyson's cap collection will be going on Ebay when he finds out how rare it now is.
Posted by Chav Mum at 2:25 PM
4 Comments:
Yes Pumpkin,
You are 100 percent correct, it is a terrible shame about what's happening to Burberry.
It's shocking, disgraceful, a nightmare and absolutely disgusting that another Welsh icon is biting the dust, just like the Arms Park. I mean, who needed a National Stadium for heaven's sake?
But I haven't come to a cybercafe for the first time in my life and I'm not paying this cute 17 year old called Trudy (his words, not mine, and I'm not going to the pub with him after - Trudy) to do the typing for me just to discuss the fate of poor, old Burberry.
You see, I want you back in my life. I MUST have you back, darling. I do want to marry you, straight up. I promise I'll get a divorce - sorry, divorces - as soon as I can legally do so.
I will throw away both my wedding rings and that I promise. My heart's desire is to have only your ring on my finger. Your ring, my finger and together we can make a good fist of our future together!
It breaks my heart when you write about a S.H.A.G.A.T.H.O.N. (Shazza's Horny And Getting A Top Humpin' Out Nightclubbin') with all sorts, not to mention throwing love bites around like they're confetti. (I want them to be my love bites and our confetti).
And, frankly, I certainly don't want other men venturing where only I should venture once you've had a few pints inside you. If it was only a few pints getting inside you it wouldn't be a problem but you've made it plain as a pikestaff (and, please, no jokes about that, you know how sensitive I am about my, you know...), that you're prepared to bestow your wicked charms on any bloke sober enough to rise to the occasion.
Stop and think what you're doing, my angel. You're trampling on our dreams and our future.
Do I want us to be together forever? As I intended to tell the vicar as they played our wedding song in church, "I do, I do, I do, I do!"
Don't forsake me, or ABBA!
Dear Ms Welsh Victim,
We were unable to respond to your email because some lunatic mail-bombed our email address and we hadn't noted down your addie.
Fortunately, we remembered the name of your website.
We would prefer this to not be quite so public but in the circumstances don't have much choice.
Yes, we can look after your "pressing little problem". And, no, rest assured, it is not this company's practice to advise recipients of "our services" of our clients' identities.
Examples of our rates (all prices in pounds sterling):
Thumb (1): 150
Finger (1, excluding thumb): 200
Kneecap (1): 250
Both kneecaps: 450
For a full, comprehensive price-list please contact us on the cellphone number we provided prior to the bombing of our email address.
Note: Discounts offered on bulk orders. No job too small -- or too big (Nudge, nudge, wink, wink).
Smallprint: No refunds available in the event of any reconciliation once this company has performed the services requested and paid for.
Fake Deke - I don't know who put you up for this, but you is not that scummer Deke, the man couldn't string two words together in the eloquent way you can.
Are you trying to hurt my feelings by raking this up again? Your suceeding. I want you to know I've just poured my second Cranberry Bacardi Breezer and am currently crying into it. They don't have Vicars in registry offices, just clerks.
That said, I'm also feeling strangely turned on by your words (it could be the hormones). You obviously know romance, so if I's up for some soon and all healed I'll txt you, come around for some Thunderbird and I'll nick a Bernard Matthews Roast Turkey from Iceland especially, we'll have a good time.
Other fellow - I'll be in touch.
I hope your baby does not have fetal alcohol syndrome the way you are drinkin'! Look that one up on t'internet
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