Sunday, October 29, 2006
Ely vs Fairwater As An Example Of Evolution
This baby must be giving me some of his brains, 'cos I've been getting an appetite for news and information and stuff. I saw this story at the BBC about a scientist called HG Wells who said the human race was splitting in two - one lot tall and handsome, the other squat, fat and ugly. It made me think about my neck of the woods and how it's already happened.
That's right, here in little old Cardiff, evolution has already happened, and I's not on about the shag palace of an over-priced nightclub down the bay. This HG Wells scientist bloke says that one species of human will be "tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative," whilst the others will be "humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures." I honestly casn't see how that's any different to what we gots here.
I means in Ely, there's a large population of the latter already, own family included. You just look down the street to see a hundred dim witted goblins going about their business - breaking into cars, spray painting the walls, snogging in the gardens, etc.
But then I looks across the valley at Fairwater and it's golden palaces, and I see the finest examples of humanity. What's more, and I know's this for a fact, as it says "men will exhibit symmetrical facial features, look athletic, and have squarer jaws, deeper voices and bigger penises" and I's had a few from Fairwater who indeed, have been all that more than the Ely fellas. You can tell they's special as they don't offer a tray of Carlings for a shag, they usually offers a bottle of wine.
And if you wanted any more proof that this has already happened, the picture of the two spieces of human on the BBC site is the spit of Ashanti and I'm not talking about the tall handsome bloke. If you want more proof of the local evolutionary split, don't forget that Charlotte Church is also from Ely. On the plus side for Ely blokes though, they will always kick the arses of those Fairwater pansys and their artsy ways.
Posted by Chav Mum at 9:36 AM
2 Comments:
Now listen to me, my lovely, I've an Ely lad an' I bin with more gaggin'-for-it slags than you've had hot love bites and no tart has never told me the reliable old john thomas has bin lackin' in any way whatsoever.
I brung more pleasure to South Wales in the past 50 years than Brains Breweries, and big an' all as you are with that fatherless bun strugglin' to bust out of the oven I'm willin' to prove it.
Any time, any place. Or are you not willin' to back up your caustic mouth and see what a real Ely lad can do when it comes down to the nits an' gritty?
I 'ates it when a tart is all mouth an' no knickers.
Put out or shut up.
More pleasure than Brains Breweries!!??
u r not from ely - you spells right (most of the time), u r almost witty and u uses postrofies and commers and stuff.
I think u r really a fairwater scumbag and is extracting the urine
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